Sorry for such a late response!

1. Yes, I agree with you. When I said they can’t be treated as a good, it was from my own perspective. And it’s not a view that I try to push on other people; I have a lot of friends who are strippers, sugar babies, cam girls, etc. I share this because I accept different opinions, but in the context of an intimate relationship, I’d require that we were on the same page about intimacy as a non-good.
2. Absolutely, I value both a loyalty cultivated over time and a loyalty that is more transactional-based. I failed to accurately describe the context of establishing loyalty. Let’s say someone receives payment for loyalty explicitly. So an exchange of money for their loyalty. It doesn’t reduce this person’s ability to have other loyal friendships. However, if I am making friends with this person organically, I would be more hesitant to trust their loyalty because of their willingness to be bought. I would wonder if they would accept a price to supersede our loyalty in the future. It’s more about value signalling and how close you’re willing to accept people with different prioritizations of value.
3. Yes, that’s also true. However, seeing as how the divorce rate is so high and if I’m trying to optimize for relationship success, I think being overly critical is necessary. If certain conditions aren’t met, but it is tolerated, I don’t think the relationship will be successful longterm, which was the main takeaway for me. I suggest being overly cautious to fully align on values or whatever other factors are personally important when taking a partner for the longterm.

I completely agree that sex is viewed differently generally and individually. I think there’s a spectrum for intimacy. On one end, it’s one intimate partner for life. On the other, intimacy is liberal and can be financially traded. The message is more about finding a person who’s in the same area of the spectrum — this goes back to the value alignment.

I also don’t disagree that my standard might change. But in my experiences thus far, my value for intimacy has been robust. While I was living in Asia, I was offered quite a few arrangements, like paid travels, living expenses, watches, etc. So I’ve seen the other side of it, but I would still never accept a financial gain in exchange for my intimacy.

Also, thanks for being respectful and for engaging in the conversation. I appreciate it!